社会の窓から英会話Social / Business

“Sadie: It’s kind of a fine line you walk, doing what I do…or did, I guess.

Miles: You mean dancing at the club.

Sadie: Yeah… when I took the job, I had just started university and even though I got a scholarship, it was only partial and already it was difficult making ends meet…It’s hard to cover expenses making minimum wage at the school library. So I quit, and I responded to a want ad for a waitress that Bacchus, that’s the name of the club I worked at, had put in the paper. It was a downtown spot, so that meant upscale clientele, which, I thought, would mean good tips. I didn’t know it was a topless bar at the time. Anyway, I went down and met with Jimmy, the manager, and he looked at me and said ‘how’d you like to try dancing instead.’ At first I didn’t know what he was taking about. Then I clued in. Well, initially I refused and got up to leave. But then Jimmy stopped me and explained that this was not some sleazy dive and that I could make really good money working as dancer…I had kind of explained about my situation at the university, you see. Anyway, after a bit of humming and hawing, I did an audition…which believe me was really embarrassing at the time, but somehow it seemed to go well and so I agreed to do it…I mean, again, it was a topless bar, not all nude, so it seemed respectable…and on my first day, when I saw the other girls, they all looked so beautiful and graceful and sexy…it wasn’t in anyway like I pictured it would be. It wasn’t pornographic or sleazy at all. So at first I loved it. It was exhilarating being on stage with the lights and music, dancing your heart out, trying to own every pair of eyes in the place…it was amazing……

Miles: Sadie?

Sadie: Sorry. Well, the novelty of the whole thing soon began to wear off, but it started in the place I least expected it to…To be honest most of the customers were great. It was an expensive place with a good reputation, so the clientele were mainly business men just out for a good time. Sure they’d get a bit rowdy and stuff, but most of them were well behaved and knew how to obey the rules.

Miles: The rules?

Sadie: No touching, no soliciting. It was…is, as I said, a classy place…If you can say that about a strip club. Anyway, some people at school found about what I did, and the word spread like wildfire…it was horrible. Friends, or supposed friends, stopped talking to me. I had girls and boys I didn’t even know calling me “slut” and “tramp”and worse than that…it was a nightmare…it got to the point where I couldn’t even go to a party without some drunk frat boy trying to feel me up or get me to take my clothes off for him.

Miles: That’s terrible.

Sadie: I don’t know…anyway to make a long story short, I left residence and moved in here, away from the school. I focused on doing my job and my studies, and spent most of my free time with the people I worked with…at least they didn’t make me feel less than human. I was able to keep my scholarship for the whole time I was at university, and the money from work covered the rest…eventually the name calling and stuff died down to a tolerable level, but that’s when the ugliest aspect of it reared its head. Underneath the fake venire of so called acquaintances – because I had very few people I considered friends at this time – and class mates were hushed whispers, and muffled laughter that followed me everywhere…and I wasn’t being paranoid either…I did get some reports of what was being said behind my back, and a lot of it I overheard by chance…people were reluctant to include me in things…or do something with me if I invited them. At least the people calling me names were honest about it. It was the insidious side of things, hidden behind a fake friendly, “tolerant” venire that burned the most…It must be so nice to be in such a perfect world where you can live on mommy and daddy’s money, drive mommy and daddy’s car, and have your perfect little set of black and white values, which tell you that saying “hi” to the slutty stripper is a comfortable shade of eggshell, but actually accepting her or, god forbid, befriending her is pitch fucking black!

Miles: Sadie, that’s a terrible thing to have to endure…I don’t envy you any of that.

Sadie: You don’t know what it’s like, Miles…people look right through you like you don’t even exist. At least I had the club, and my friends there to give me some sense of worth. Now I don’t even have that…

Miles: Sadie?…Sadie?

Sadie: Miles…God, I’m doing it again…you don’t need this…please forget about all this today…I’ll come back again, I promise…but forget it okay…I’m sorry I just…I have to go…
(leaves quickly)”